Fresh, Fly, and 25!!

"I'm the type to say a prayer and go get what I just prayed for" - Meek Millz

My 25th birthday was last Wednesday and I am already feeling like this is going to be a great year. Here is an update of what was left of my 25 goals:

25 things before 25:

1. begin a healthy romantic relationship/cut off meaningless male relationships
9. figure out career plan

10. see asthma specialist

15. talk to financial advisor about loans/savings

18. help out with dad's business (ad campaign, sales)
19. learn to be on time!!
22. buy a car
23. apply to grad programs/grants/scholarships/fellowships

25. make/stick to a budget

I completed 22/25 goals before turning 25! I missed a few, but at least for those last 3 I have been taking some steps towards them. I plan on making an appointment to see an allergist/asthma specialist when I get back to Philly in January. While I am home for the holidays I will put together a business plan with my dad and about this whole being on time thing...we'll have to see about that. :-)

I have begun what I consider to be a healthy relationship and have a really good feeling about this. I did have to break a few hearts which was not easy, but in the end I have to do what works for me. It is still very new and fresh, but I am looking forward to seeing where this can go. :-) I have realized that I am not satisfied with my career if I am not directly impacting youth. The desk life is not what I am about and need that interaction with young people to feel happy and satisfied. In that frame of mind, I have applied for another position within my organization that is supporting a number of our students. I find out next month if I have been chosen, but I am confident that I am the perfect candidate for the job.

I BOUGHT A CAR!!! After so many months of just talking about wanting one and complaining about public transportation in Philly, I decided to actually just go and see what this whole car thing is about. I went in to the dealership just curious and ended up driving off the lot with my new baby! My life has been so much easier this past week now that I don't have to run for trains, wait in the cold for buses, or worry about getting home if it gets late. The investment is definitely worth it. Along with this new investment, I researched some information about money and loans so I would know what I was getting myself into with this car/insurance/gas/registration thing. I decided to put together a budget since I now have a ton more expenses. Hopefully I will stick to it so I won't be Broke Betty at the end of each month.

I finished all of my grad school applications and am just waiting for my recommendation letters and transcripts to arrive at the schools. This definitely was not the most difficult process, but did take some motivation on my part to complete everything while working 2 jobs and coaching. The next step once I hear back from the schools is to figure out how the heck I am going to pay for this next degree. 

All in all 25 has been great to me so far and I can't wait to see what more is in store for me! I am thankful for life, health, family, and love and no one can take this happiness away from me!

Put a ring on it!

So lately there has been an epidemic taking over facebook! What's that you ask? No not memes, engagements! It seems like every day I log on someone else I know has a picture of a diamond ring and facebook conveniently flashes me an announcement. Now don't get me wrong, I am by no means hating...I do not want to be anyone's wife at least for the next 5 years (In high school, my ex and I had planned to already be married by now. Oh how life changes.). I am just trying to figure out if I've reached the age where everyone starts to begin their lives with a mate, or if there is some kind of marriage fever going around that I have the vaccine for.

Speaking of marriage, relationships in general seem to be the topic of discussion when my cousins and I meet up. The older, married with kids ones always seem to get around to ask us young, single, childless people who we are currently dating and we begin to tell these "hard out here" stories that last all night. Is it really that hard out here? Or are we just too picky? One last resounding statement one of the "elders" did say, was that it is never going to be perfect. I guess she meant that at some point you realize this person is not going to be everything on your checklist, but he suits the majority of things you want in a companion and the things he does not meet up to aren't as important as you thought.

I am not sure where I stand in that equation though. It seems I find someone who I feel fits perfectly with me, but oops, he's not ready for a commitment! Then there are the guys who really don't scratch half a bullet on my "list", but they sooo want to make me theirs! Sometimes I do wonder if I give a guy too much of a hard time, but then again am I not supposed to have standards? I guess I'll just keep doing what I do, and prince charming will dance his way into my life. Maybe he'll be disguised as a frog!

One month to 25!!

Be the president of your life! So I saw this post from Happy Black Woman on election day, but did not read it until 10 minutes ago. I was not feeling as enthusiastic about the election and all the hoopla in the weeks leading up to it. I did not post anything on facebook or any other site I am glued to every day, but somehow was feeling a little guilty about it. That post states exactly what was going through my mind. While I did vote, I just could not help but think that my life would be exactly the same the day after the election. I mean, there would probably be changes nationwide in the long run, but the result would not directly impact my day to day life. I would still have student loan debt, be at the same job, worry about applying to grad school, and my asthma and allergies would not magically go away. 

All that being said, after I read the post I wondered why I had not just read it that day. She makes some really good points. No president is going to make my life change for me. Obama is not going to complete those applications for me, nor will he help me figure out what I want to do with my life! I have to be the one to have the motivation to take the steps to become who I want to be and accomplish what I want to do.

This conversation in my head made me think back to my very first post on here, 25 things before 25. I am exactly one month shy of my 25th birthday and I am not sure I have actively been achieving these goals. Here are the things I still needed to complete:

25 things before 25:
1. begin a healthy romantic relationship/cut off meaningless male relationships
7. join basketball league/team/play regularly (play 1-2x a week)
9. figure out career plan
10. see asthma specialist
13. develop braiding/twisting clientele (not many but yes)
15. talk to financial advisor about loans/savings
16. paint/write - creative art (did my first painting during sandy)
18. help out with dad's business (ad campaign, sales)
19. learn to be on time!!
20. learn about US politics (I read a lot of information during the election)
22. buy a car
23. apply to grad programs/grants/scholarships/fellowships
25. make/stick to a budget

I did knock off a few things I had left, but still have a ways to go. I guess I really have no control over #1 so I may just count the 2nd half of it as completed. I do have plans to discuss a business plan with my dad when I go home for Thanksgiving in a few days so I should be able to put some ideas into motion before my 25th. I am going to look for cars this weekend as well and had set a deadline of Dec 1st (that is probably NOT going to happen). I am almost done with my applications, so they WILL all be submitted by Dec 19th! I am going to use my extended weekend to work on the other items on this list so that some progress can be made by next week. I really want to do this! It is time to start setting goals and actually sticking to them! I have got to be the Obama of my own life!

What makes you happy? PART 2

As I am sitting in my room awaiting Hurricane Sandy, aka Frankenstorm, I decided to grab my paint, brushes, and a blank canvas and get to expressing myself. I also started thinking about my happy list since tomorrow is a "snow day" and I get to sleep in (2 things on the first half of my list) and thought I should finish posting it.

100 things that make Mandisa happy (#51-100)
51. natural hair
52. whispers in my ear
53. kisses on my neck
54. juicy Gala apples
55. chicken - baked, fried, grilled
56. snickers bars
57. braiding hair
58. free ANYTHING
59. food samples at stores/in the mall
60. chubby funny looking kids
61. forehead kisses
62. being told I am missed
63. being held by the waist by a nice man
64. nice white smiles
65. being told I did a good job
66. feeling appreciated
67. SUNNY DAYS
68. SUMMER
69. seasoned food (food in general)
70. learning about different cultures
71. LOVE
72. seeing love around me
73. my crazy friends
74. sleepovers with friends I haven't seen in a while
75. dancing as I get dressed
76. the smile on someone's face when I surprise them
77. late night phone convos until I fall asleep
78. having an event I planned go great
79. a clean kitchen
80. the smell of clean laundry
81. a cute bathroom
82. talking to my mom
83. driving
84. the sun in my face in the morning
85. eyeshadow
86. cute nail polish and designs
87. compliments on my hair
88. my hair the day after I wash and style it
89. surprise visits
90. sweet random messages
91. seeing a child understand a concept
92. sexy dresses
93. live music performances
94. musicals
95. GLEE!!
96. the idea of having my own family
97. waking up to a nice face
98. sleeping on his chest
99. God
100. LIFE

Here's my first finished painting. 'Sankofa - Untitled' for now.

Inspired by this quote I saw on Pinterest: "I emerge from the ignorance of my past to pure overstanding of my present."

What makes you happy? PART 1

I have really been emotional lately and I am pretty sure it is because of the years of build up. I learned growing up that if something bothered me or made me sad, to not express this feeling. The only emotion I continuously expressed was anger. I used to cry a lot without a moment's notice, but somewhere between high school and college I stopped. I have only genuinely full out cried 3 times in the past 3 years. I know that can't be healthy. Thanks to a conversation with a friend tonight, I am seeing that crying does not mean you are weak and is sometimes necessary.

A few years ago I started the 31 Days to Reset Your Life program where you complete daily activities to find out what is important to you and maximize your life. (I actually started this 6 times since then and never got past day 10.) One of the activities was to list 100 things that make you happy. Lately people have been asking me what my hobbies are, what I really enjoy doing, and what truly makes me happy, and I have not been able to come up with an answer. I honestly have not been truly consistently happy for a little while now. Maybe revisiting this list and beginning to express my feelings a lot more will help.

100 things that make Mandisa happy

1. R&B music

2. shooting 3 pointers

3. jokes

4. babies making faces

5. hugs from students

6. good male company

7. late night car talks

8. bright colors

9. how I look in the mirror

10. reggae/dancehall/soca

11. Dominica

12. my crazy/interesting family

13. helping younger students

14. getting my nails done

15. funky hairstyles

16. the smell of a familiar man on my pillow

17. chocolate cake

18. margaritas

19. sweet tea vodka

20. my birthday

21. other people's birthdays

22. Fridays

23. snow days

24. going home early from work

25. making fun of my students

26. when people give me a nickname

27. happy hours

28. finding cute earrings

29. thrifting

30. little children reading books/sounding smart

31. being able to sleep in 

32. flirting

33. a good kiss

34. hearts

35. a clean smelling room

36. getting rid of clutter

37. old school hip hop

38. a good workout

39. finding a new pair of cute shoes

40. perfect pair of jeans

41. doodling during boring meetings

42. completing a puzzle/word game

43. interracial groups of friends

44. stepping

45. jumping double dutch

46. watching a good comedy film

47. teaching young people step

48. popping lipgloss

49. clean teeth

50. locs

The first 50 are listed here since I realized 100 would be a little long. Look out for part 2 of my list.

Wanna be on top?

It is October 1st. I guess I have to accept that summer is over now. That being said this past weekend was Fall Fest in Love Park and with that came my fashion show debut!! Saturday was indeed a VERY long day, but a fun and exciting one!

My eyes were opened to a little bit of what the fashion industry is like. It all felt very ANTMesque! (I've watched every episode). First there was a casting call about 3 weeks ago. I went there and did not know what to expect. I filled out a sheet with my name, age, and measurements and patiently waited for the designers to arrive. Thirty minutes later, I was still sitting waiting with 2 other girls. At that point we were just asked one by one to walk for the two designers who were there. I had no idea what to do since the only runway walking I'd done was playing around with my friends, but I put on my heels and walked for the camera. I had already done some modeling for one of the designers in the show, so I think I was an automatic pick for them.

When the final model spreadsheet was emailed out a week later including measurements and dress size, I felt big for the first time! Everyone was a size 0-4. I thought I was a 4 once, but the size 4 H&M dress I bought (that looked like it was my size) wouldn't even fit over my shoulders! This feeling got worse when I went to the model fitting and saw the other models in person. Not only were they taller than me, they were all sticks and also pretty much all had the same look. Now don't get me wrong, I love my body 97% of time, and am pretty sure I'll never be a size 4 even if I starved myself (thank my grandma's thighs and hips for that). BUT, there's something about being around 20 women who are thinner than you that'll make even a fit girl feel like Precious. I quickly realized I had been selected only for BluDahlia since they actually make clothes that fit the average woman and I wouldn't fit into any other designer's clothing.

Once I left there I swore I was going to go on a juice or fruit/veggie fast for the whole week before the show, but alas I love food way too much to do that. The night before the show I decided not to go out so I wouldn't feel nor look tired. I was supposed to be there by 9am and we weren't walking until 4:30pm so I knew it would be a long day! The day included time spent in hair and makeup by AnBrea's Beauty Salon, a lot of watching the other models try on clothing, watching the other designers collections on the runway, trying not to eat all the delicious tuna pita sandwiches, practicing my face in the mirror, and running through my walk in my head. For once I was not nervous! If you know me, you know that I get nervous about everything all the time; from a major interview to asking my dad for a dollar. This time I was fully confident that I would look fabulous, wouldn't fall and probably would walk better than some of the models who went before me who are actually represented by an agency.

Check out the pics and look out for more modeling updates from me!

Flea Away!

I may have a flea market addiction. There is a one every weekend in Philadelphia and I am even signed up for a listserve to get emails. There is nothing like finding a gem beneath the plethora of random things sold at these markets. Here's what I got this past weekend at the Society Hill Vintage Flea Market:

Rope chain: $3

Pendant chain: $5

button earrings: $1 each

faux fur clutch: $4

I think this is definitely $14 well spent especially since it was just a quick 45 minute trip. I'd normally come home with so much more!

Check out these flea markets in Philadelphia:
Phila Flea Markets
Pennsy Flea Market
Uhuru Flea Market

What gems have you found at flea markets? Stay tuned for my review of the BEST thrift stores in Philly!

Countdown to 25

I am at a point in my life where I have fully accepted who I am and am ready to show everyone who that person is. I have done some thorough evaluations of the past 5 years and am proud of the person I have become. This blog will be the start of that sharing. I started my first blog about 2 years ago, but kept it private. Here you will read about my random wanderings around the city, observations of the world around me, and the outfits that make me happy. I think a good way to start this one off is with a list I created 7 months ago.

25 things before 25:
1. begin a healthy romantic relationship/cut off meaningless male relationships
2. perform on stage 
3. file own taxes
4. go on a trip by myself
5. learn to sew
6. modeling (pursue opps)
7. join basketball league/team/play regularly
8. get closer to immediate family (dad, mom, brother)
9. figure out career plan
10. see asthma specialist
11. start locs
12. workout at least 1x week
13. develop braiding/twisting clientele
14. mentor a high school/college student
15. talk to financial advisor about loans/savings
16. paint/write - creative art
17. REALLY love myself
18. help out with dad's business (ad campaign, sales)
19. learn to be on time!!
20. learn about US politics
21. take GRE
22. buy a car
23. apply to grad programs/grants/scholarships/fellowships
24. go to church 2-3x/month/ grow spiritually/read Bible
25. make/stick to a budget

I haven't looked at this list since I wrote it on 2/16/12 and without even knowing it I completed about half of it. With 3 months to go to December 19th, I think I can do everything on this list! Wish me well! Here goes!